I'm not suppose to be on the computer right now. Actually, I had tasked myself with cleaning out the second bedroom today. I'm finding it almost impossible to do though, it's so damn hot!
So, I figured I would update my blog!
A lot has happened since my last post. I had transferred to the Mesa store to help my mom out there.
Near the end of the year was amazing. So many great things hit me all at once.
For one, one of my good friends, Ed, came down to visit. I miss only living a couple of hours away from him. Having him live closer to Boston is a bummer, but it was a great treat to have him visit in November.
Right before he came down I had undergone an interview for a Store Manager's position for the Camelback location (I was holding a Shift Leader position at the Mesa store at that moment). It was quite the glass case of emotion I was going through that week. Super excited that my friend was visiting and hanging out with us (I always have a great time when he is around) and super anxious about what the answer would be to the interview.
I remember we went out to get coffee and lunch the day before Ed left and I got a phone call from my District Manager. I instantly broke into shakes and sweats and walked away from the table to take the phone call. It felt like time slowed down when she said, "Would you like to accept the position?" I couldn't believe it! I wanted to cry because I was so happy. I am sure I sounded like a crazy person to her. I asked her if she was sure and she just laughed. I beebopped back to our table announcing my victory and pretty much was glowing all day.
I was finally going to put my mad skills to good use and I was completely ready for the challenge. I had already worked at this store before transferring to Mesa so it wouldn't be completely unfamiliar territory.
It was also a sad day because Ed was leaving the next day. So that was a bummer.
I should say, I was also growing completely nervous about something else that was going on that I didn't discuss with anyone.
My period was late.
Now, my body, I can tell you, is very sensitive to stress and I have delayed periods from being extremely stressed. That or when I get back into shape...And I know I hadn't been working out lately. (And this may be TMI) but I've even missed periods before just from stress and/or workout habits.
I figured that I was just super stressed about hearing back about the job. I thought that, combined with staying up late gaming with friends, was also the reason I was unusually fatigued. But the day after Ed left would be day seven of no Aunt Flo. And routinely I had bought a pregnancy test a few days before hearing about the job offer.
Nothing ever came from the tests, but it was a way to rule out one reason why.
STORY TIME!
So, again, the day after my friend left I decided to take the test in the morning fully expecting to toss the pee stick labeled with a "no" in the trash and go right back to sleep. I didn't wait more than a couple of seconds before I saw a result that I had never seen before. Wtf.......is that a positive???? I looked back and forth between the instructions and the stick for a couple of minutes. I sucked in a breath and held it there for forever. Do I scream? Do I shout with excitement? Do I retest? Wtf....WTF! What do I do NOW?? Dan's right out there sleeping...how am I suppose to tell him? WHAT'S GOING ON?!
Remember that time slowing down thing from earlier? Yeah, that totally happened again. I walked to the bed and just sat there. My eyes must have looked like saucers and I know I had told Dan that I was going to take the test so he sleepily rolled over and asked, "So?" Mind you, we've gone through plenty of "scares" and test taking and I'm sure he knew something was up when I didn't respond right away. "Well....." was all I could respond. Yeah, I left him hanging for a sec because my brain could not wrap around what was going on at the moment. "So....?" he asked again.
"I think it's positive?" I really have no excuse for that response...
"You think??"
"Well......it wasn't negative...sooo..."
Stunned. It was like someone hit me with a stun gun or something. I couldn't believe it wasn't negative.
All Daniel did was hug me sleepily. And that's when the waterworks hit me.
WHAT?! WHAAAAT?! WTF IS GOING ON?! I CANT BE PREGNANT NOW! The test is trolling me. I just know it. There is not a potential little thing inside me. WHAT IS GOING ON UNIVERSE?!
I just sat there and balled my eyes out. Dan was sweet trying to reassure me that everything was going to work out and that we'll be fine. I hate when he says that sometimes. That was one of the times. I mean, I should have been so happy that he reacted that way instead of packing a suitcase. Not that he's that kind of guy..but my mind always goes into worse case scenarios.
I think my mind went straight into panic mode not because I was going to have a child growing inside me and that I would be a parent..but because I had just accepted a job as a Store Manager the day before. I felt like somehow I was letting my DM down by being pregnant, which now, I feel really silly about reacting that way.
I actually met up with my DM to interview someone for the Assistant Manager's position at my location (that store went through a LOT of changes..) and at the end of the interview after the dude had left I confessed to my DM that I just found out that I was pregnant and again, I started balling like an idiot. She laughed and asked, "That's great! ...That's great, right?"
Yeah, it was great. And the wave of relief that came over me after she sounded happy for me..was overwhelming. For some reason I thought he would have this sense of disappointment and I didn't feel that from her at all. I told her I was going to still work as hard as I could to prove that I deserved the position.
So, since December, I've been managing my own store and I am currently 29 weeks pregnant.
Needless to say, great things came to Daniel and I fast and hard at the end of 2013.
I am loving my job to death and am so grateful for an amazingly awesome and supportive boss. I love my store, the work that comes with it, and the assistant I have. I feel like a fruit that was waiting to ripen for the job and when the time came to be picked, I was ready and it felt natural. I know there is still plenty to learn but I am having so much fun being a boss. :)
I am also loving being pregnant. I have so much more to write on that though..I might have to do separate entries for that explaining our journey. The very least I can say that we are expecting a baby girl (whom we've been calling Matilda for now) on July 17 and we are planning on a unmedicated waterbirth.
Anyways, I think I'm going to leave it at that for now. But I wanted to make sure I logged this SOMEWHERE since I don't keep a physical journal anymore. *tear*
More to come..
-Angel
Stay tuned: Minion Diaries - My Pregnancy : How it's been thus far.
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